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Going Through a Tough Time

So, my house flooded a couple weeks ago with the heavy storms that came through the area over a 24 hour period. It was some intense storms. As a result my tenants home flooded. They were nice, but I could tell they were very upset. I got the sump pump fixed. I also paid to have all the drains in the house fixed to make sure that they are properly draining. With all that done, and thousands spent, there is still no guarantee that the house will not flood again. It is so upsetting. I am feeling so overwhelmed with everything and am very, very stressed out. Work has been very busy and stressful as well. I am happy to have my job, and I love it, but I have just been under the gun lately. I also had to do some consulting and that came on at the same time as all of this. It has been one thing after another. And then I had a health scare that was pretty serious. It is clearing up thank god, but it really stressed me out. I did go to a friends house last night for movie night and that was nice. I also haven't been as good at my exercising as I usually am, and my sleep is suffering lately. My sleep hasn't returned fully since I broke up with Harold. The breakup really depressed me. Then when I had a health issue, possibly cancer, he said he was too busy to help me out. That really hurt because I have done so much for him and he just dismissed me. He is now calling but I haven't answered. I probably should block his number because it is just depressing me. I can't move on. I still love him. It is so hard for me because I miss him so much, but he wanted to find someone else that could give him what he wanted. I can't do that for him. I don't want to get married again. I do not want to have children. He deserves those things if that is what he wants. Most people do want those things. I just don't. I am too old for kids at this point. If I had had kids, they would be in high school and almost graduating by now. I should not have dated him because he is 19 years younger than me. He had his whole life ahead of him. He didn't know what he wanted at such a young age. Now he does. But I wish he would stop calling me, yet on the other hand I want him to call me. I would be devastated if he found someone else and I knew about it. That is why I don't want to talk to him.

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